Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Nothing

We got the results back from the million tests we had done last week...

Nothing.  As far as non-chromosomal issues go (which we opted to not have done), we're as healthy as horses.  The only thing that came back at all abnormal was that my Vitamin D level was low (which can affect fertility).  The nurse said most people had a low Vitamin D level, so it wasn't a huge deal, but they are putting me on a supplement for the next 6 weeks.  But blood clotting, thyroid, all of Noah's counts are perfectly normal.

I don't know how I feel about that.  I wanted something that we could pinpoint, something we could "fix."  I've very quickly learned over the past 6 months that I'm a fixer...and it frustrates me to no end if I can't fix it.  Obviously, God's got a lesson in this one for me.  It's just a hard pill to swallow at this point.  But, the good news is we're looking at a 70% chance of having a healthy pregnancy next time if we take absolutely no medical action, and we are taking medical action.  You figure that has to improve our chances!

As of today, we're officially headed into our first Clomid cycle.  I start the Clomid (more than likely) Sunday.  I know it's really weird that I'm on Clomid, because I'm obviously ovulating on my own and very consistently, but the doctor says this can improve the overall quality of everything (so this can cancel out the egg quality factor, if that's the problem).  Anybody that's ever been on Clomid knows what's about to happen...a lot of blood work, a lot of ultrasounds, a lot of monitoring.  I'm willing to do it ALL if that's what it takes to get our baby home!

I'm also having an HSG done probably next week.  I'm just not sure that's the issue, because I haven't had issues getting pregnant, but I'm willing to try anything at this point.  But, it more than likely means missing MORE work.  Y'all, I can't tell you how guilty this makes me.  I've missed SO much work from all of this this year, and it's just not fair to my babies.  Not to mention that my principal is a SAINT for not being mad about all of this.  I just don't need any more reason to feel like I can't get ahead right now, you know?

I do have a good feeling about this month though.  If it almost works without any medical help, it has to work with medical help, right?