Monday, December 27, 2010

Life Lately

Life lately has been very different.  We're getting ready for our first appointment with the infertility specialists this Wednesday.  It's so weird to be put under the umbrella of infertility, since we really don't have a big problem getting pregnant.  It's staying pregnant that is our problem.

I just got through filling out the paperwork for the appointment (there's a TON of it).  I feel like I just told this place my entire life history.  But if it helps me get my baby, it's worth it!  We're still a little concerned whether or not insurance is going to cover the testing and any procedures/medications I have to have...so prayers in that department would be very appreciated.  Depending on the cost, there's no way we can afford these tests on our own.  We find out Wednesday what is covered and what isn't, so we'll see.

I keep saying that, no matter what the tests tell us, I want to know.  I've read that only about half of the people that get tested after recurrent miscarriages actually find out what is wrong.  That's ok with me actually.  Even if we find out that there is nothing wrong and these were just a complete fluke, I still want to know that there isn't something we could be preventing.

This past week has been pretty rough.  This would have been the week I found out the sex of the baby with the first pregnancy, and would have been the week we saw the heartbeat with the second pregnancy.  We also would have told our families about the second pregnancy this week (we already had it planned out)...add all of that in with Christmas, and it was just very difficult.  I held it together for the most part, but there were definitely times when I broke down.  I've never known a Christmas like this.  It's usually my favorite time of year, but it was just so, so different this year.  I completely understand why there are people that have a hard time with the holidays now (which I never understood before).

It's a big week for us, and I'm just trying to stay busy as much as possible to keep my mind off of it.  Christmas decorations are coming down TODAY.  I'm also trying to catch up on blog work (which I've been a TOTAL slacker in lately) this afternoon, and clean this wreck of a house. :)

If I can get to next weekend with a clean house, nothing to do, and some answers as to why this is happening, I'll be a happy girl.